16 February 2006

This Evening's Near-Death Experience

So, I'm sitting in SmartCookie, munching on a day-old, semi-sweet chocolate chip cookie and listening to Roundy sweet-talk Jane, an attractive bowling alley attendant (it turns out that these two things are not mutually exclusive). He drops a particularly clever line on this girl, and I start laughing mid-bite. Consequently, I inhale my late-nite snack and promptly gridlock the oxygen highway from my lungs to my brain. Next thing I know, I wake up in a pool of partially-digested snickerdoodles to the words, "Someone call 9-1-1."

And people say you can't have fun without drinking.

6 comments:

Ronnie said...

Are you kidding me! I've always wanted something like that to happen to me.

Camille said...

I would say I had the privilege of seeing this event. But it was actually really scary. I'm just glad you are alive Rusty!

bec said...

that's amazing that you can eat day old chocolate chip cookies and partially digest them to become snickerdoodles. Unless it was someone else's pile of partially- digested snickerdoodles. ew. I bet if you digested them a little less they could have been peanut butter.

How did things turn out with Jane? I bet she fell for you instead because of your near death experience, am I right?

by the way, I'm glad you're alive too

Bryant said...

Would I have gotten straight A's if you'd've died? Your vomit-reflex might have ruined my best chance at graduating from college.

Bonesaw said...

Sadly it has come to the point where my wreckless flirting is beginning to threaten the lives of others. To be completely honest the way i see it, the elimination of competition only betters my chances. Let that be a warning to all those i use as "friends", I will stop at nothing until i see my needs met. If it costs a few of you along the way, so be it.

Ronnie said...

Russ, I think that someone is watching over you. You should try the physical challenge while you have this protection.